Friday, 23 December 2011

"A" word and a few bad manners!

We Indians have serious issues when it comes to addressing strangers. The best bet is to call someone 'sir' or 'madam'. The 'sir' becomes 'saaaaaar' to South Indians, ' sher' to North Indians...We tend to pronounce the word with our regional colors. Here comes the list of most irritating ways to address a person, not necessarily in the same order!

1. A- word adolescents:

The blood boils in every cell...the tension is palpable as he lingers along the counter, awaiting my reply. That is when the canine in me wakes up and makes a plunge, i almost bark, seething in anger-"I am not your aunty, just call me madam". Bewildered, he looks at me again, a five foot frame draped in a cotton salwar with dupatta pinned up chin high, sindoor, few stary hairs and of course, a few extra pounds...May be age is related to weight, so how is it to be called when you are a mere thirty two, by a half crazy adolescent? Anna and his cadres, please call for a fast to delete the word "Aunty" from Websters'.  

2. Crappy clappers:

This is one tribe definitely different. You can find them on random roadsides. They usually spring into action when you drop something unknowingly and walk on. They clap and clap till their palms become red and the whole area turns toward them. As he hands over the stuff he had picked up on the sidewalk, you feel like smacking him on his back for letting the whole wide world know that you are idiotic and irresponsible. Dumbhead probably clapped all his life for others! And this clapping might be of heavenly use when you are awaiting an auto rickshaw. The louder you clap, the easier auto walah will hear you rather than the hefty woman on the opposite pavement's meek wave of hands.

3. Whistle bloopers:

These are the most annoying ones. We can safely exclude the bus conductors from this ilk, but must add the indecent monkeys jumping in front of movie screens in any movie hall. Well, the tribe do exist now, though their number is dwindling fast, thankfully! I feel like biting off the fingers that whoosh in and out of that ugly mouth...And i love glaring at the traffic constable who whistles and gestures every lady in the vicinity to move her vehicle behind the Lakshman Rekha! These whistle bloopers deserve a special punishment, we could chop their tongues off!!!

4. Coin tappers:

Have you ever went to some office and tapped on the glass counter with coins when the clerk is busy on a call? This is how it feels when you are on the other side- you feel like snatching the coin away and bang the person's head right on the glass! The sound of coins tapped on the counter glass or granite top is definitely not sweet, i say...

We definitely lack etiquette and manners when behaving in public. We like to tap, clap, whistle and christen anyone Aunty! I almost forgot my real name, being called aunty a hundred times a day. No more forgiveness. Next person calls me an aunty is going to be slaughtered, that is for sure!

P.S. - I have been quite busy with my brother's ensuing wedding and not so regular with the posts, please excuse. Don't care!
P.P.S.- Does the word "uncle" irks men more? I would like to know;)
P.P.P.S.- I scolded someone in my office today for jumping the queue- literally "jumping" a row of chairs and he was 46 years old!! Imagine his face when i called out on the mike- " Sir, you are 46, please don't jump"!!!
P.P.P.P.S.- Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to all fellow bloggers and readers:)


  1. Lovely post and TRUE !
    we lack basic manners, which no book will teach :(
    as time pass by we may still get worst or we may develop !


  2. You missed out one VERY important and THE most annoying way of calling someone...have you had some random guy on the road make 'shush-shush' noises to grab your attention? As if you were a dog that only heard there infrasonic calls? And he would be a stupid stranger, dammit, calling your attention to something as silly as his dying NEED to know what the time is, despite him wearing a bulky showy watch!

    I feel like grabbing him by his neck and slamming his head on the nearest electric post till spark fly off it!

    Nice, post :D

  3. hahaha... i agree its very annoying and also funny :P
    Calling someone as 'sir' or 'mam' is the safest bet.
    Am laughing so hard at the p.p.p.s. hahaha.. I can imagine his face!

  4. Even I hate the word Aunty. Indians especially North Indians think it is very respectable to called any body aunty. And there are some who would at least ask what should they call me, I would always say call Akka/ didi, that sounds much better than aunty.
    I don't mind be called a aunt by someone to whom I am an aunt by relation, but not by every Tom, Dick and Harry and everybody else.
    Also some people who would be just few years younger than me, just because they know that you have 2 kids they think it is alright to call me aunty.
    In that sense the west is the best they call everyone by their names.
    I hope people who are using this term would read this and realize tha tit not cool to call everyone Aunty/ Uncle.

  5. LOL, your posts and the PS parts never fail to crack me up!

    Hilarious, Loved the first one... Reminded me of that dialogue from the serial 'Hum Paanch' - Aunty, mat kaho naa :D

    Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you too, CN :)

  6. 1.What s wrong with calling some one as AUNT..Its our culture in Villages to cal any Ldy as "AKKA" and n CITIES as "AUNTY". irrespective of age. so here villagers(we hav a upper hand to our Urban counterparts I hope)
    2.cLAPPERS: WHATS wrong wit the clapper if he is really interested only in helpng u. so how else u want him to CAL u in a public.. that too frm a certain distance.(so yuu want them to throw stones for gathering attention?!)
    3.Whstle blowers -really irritating except for RAJNIKANT opning films. It is they Who make watchin Super star film's opening SHOWS a gr8 experience.
    4.COIN TAPPERS i dont mind until they did nt scold me for Not givin the right change...

    PPS- The word UNC irks men .. donno.. bt smal gals Cal me unc.. bt i don feel irritates.. adolosents cal me anna.. so i can rep only aft some time..
    PPPS-Jumpin QUE.. is really bad manners.. thats why we experience stampedes at times in PUBLIC GATHERINGs.(in 2005 i think in chnnai 2000 died whn they gathered togethr to collect RAIN RELIEF FUND).

  7. @ Deepak Karthick- Thanks for the wishes. Happy you liked the post!

    @ Indumathy- Hahaha! I can perfectly understand your feelings when you say about banging the head of the Romeo on the electric post:P Thanks for the comment:)

    @ Girlatfirstavenue- Yeah;) He was red faced and muttered something under his breath which i dutifully ignored:P

    @ Rama- Exactly! I share the same views. Having two children doesn't qualify us as AUNTY to the whole neighborhood!

    @ Arti- Hahaha! You reminded me of that "aunty mat kaho na!" LOL! Thanks for the wishes dear!

  8. It;s India dude, everyone's an aunty or an uncle ;)

  9. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year to you too...

    Someone is Special

  10. here in Mumbai you have sometime the people calling you "pori" or "chokri"...i hate these words...though they mean as simple as..calling you a "girl" in Marathi...but still feels awkward..!!!
    great post....!!
    merry Christmas and new year!!

  11. I knw Men who literally bash people up just because they called him an UNCLE :P
    Merry Chritmas!!!!

  12. People love to give titles...bhaiyya, behenji, aunty..

    For me aunty is has become a norm...I am dreading Mataji....

  13. @ Cloud Nine the most annoying way of addressing a person can be seen in the city of Mumbai- they make hissing sounds "SSSS"! I have almost slapped people on the road during my two years there for daring to address me like that! Then there are those who yell out "Hallo"- bearable but not the hissing sounds!! And about the A word- I am also very allergic to it especially when it is uttered by a twenty something person! Good post- hope you had a Merry Christmas!

  14. LOL...Aunty is a a word Indians love to use. If you are little overweight or married, you are an AUNTY.

    Manners is one word we use only when someone misbehaves with us. Otherwise, we don't know its meaning.

    Enjoy the wedding...:) Happy New Year to you too:)

  15. I have got so used to this 'Aunty; title.As a young pre-school teacher, I was addressed as aunty .Then after I got married and had children ,the newly married ones called me aunty.Now with a few silver streaks popping up ,I wonder if they'll call me 'Archi'

  16. Hahhaha! I do know what you mean but surprisingly it doesn't irk me much. I think I just don't pay attention, but I can see why it would be annoying.

    ♡ from ©

  17. I have had one incident where in the rickshaw man got so angry when we addressed him as 'uncle' that he stopped the auto, turned to us and said in a loud voice - "I will take you to your destination only if u stop calling me Uncle"

    Imagine that :D :D

    1. Hahaha! That was one humble rickshaw man. If it were me, i'd have left you stranded on the middle of the road:P LOL!!


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