Sunday 1 February 2015

The Club Of Noisy Women

This time over, no apologies. A blogger does deserve a break, right? So long as it is not a bone that is broken ;) I have indeed had a very satisfying short vacation to the most divine and wild place- Valparai. Hell no, this is not one more travelogue. I reserve the travelogue for later. This time, it is going to be a post on shhhhhh...silent...calm...gentle....

I am an expressionist. With large eyes protruding from an equally large face, I ooze of well...sound! I am noisy. Not nosy. How is that? Being a woman and noisy? Being a lady and laughing out aloud? Being a woman and witty? Being a woman and walking with head held high and shoulders squared? If you have the same decibel of laughter emanating from you that grips everyone around you, well, welcome to the Club of Noisy Women, ladies!

Having grown up in one of the most conservative village, which is at the heart of a wildlife sanctuary, I am not used to that melodious and mellifluous voice. Though my female cousins inherited the oh so sweet voice of nightingale, I happened to inherit the gruffest kookaburra's voice. It always is a few octaves higher than my mother would have liked. It rose to so many octaves when I was chatting away with friends. I required lot of 'disciplining' from my mother to bring it few notes lower. But I am sorry mom, it has never worked! I just pretend to keep my voice few decibels lower when with family. When I indeed feel happy, hormones wreak havoc and I am the usual 'me'.

I was taught the art of walking for a long long time...how to keep your legs one after the other, crossing each other. Right, then left, the toe placed right at the heel of the right. I wonder why a woman is taught how to walk...when everyone expects her to run! Fetch is the game the family likes to play with her- 'bring my tie', 'mom! Where is my pencil box?', 'amma...where is washing powder?' all questions bombarded at the same moment and being the lady of the family that you are, being responsible, you are expected at 101 places at the same time. 

How would it be, if you walked like a model on the ramp when the husband is yelling at his maximum capacity for the forgotten keys? Somewhere along the 36 odd years, I forgot how mother taught me to cat-walk. My walk now resembles that of a zombie at times when I am early to work and that of a waddling duck when I am late. I envy those women who pretend to be oblivious to the surroundings and walk with such clinical precision of a cat, how much ever late they may be!

Hopefully the number of mothers who now ask their children, especially the girl children to 'keep low' and to 'walk gentle' has dwindled. The myths of olden days when a girl who talked soft, walked gentle and laughed minimal being held as someone with a 'kind heart' and 'girly' girl remain shattered today. All of us have seen otherwise- those 'silent whisperers' are not always that soft and those 'rowdy louder ones' are not that harsh, when it comes to their lives. Those who have been at the receiving end of their arrogant stubbornness of the so-called gentle ones of the female species, would know by now that 'voices and walks' are deceptive!

It really doesn't matter how you dress up. The decibel of your voice seldom defines what you are. Your walk never reveals your inner strength and attitude. Whenever I see classes that teach 'soft skills' all I do is heartily laugh. Do you need someone to tell you how to be someone else you are not? Do you need someone to dress you up and put you on a display? Window dressing is needed only when you are not marketable ;) Instead, it is the attitude you have towards life that keeps up your image. Just be you! Laugh heartily...talk freely...walk with confidence! Love the voice that resonates from you. Romance your laughter. Enjoy the way you saunter...Shed your false skin. Leave out your pretensions. The world is ours!

p.s.: I do blog erratically. Guilty as charged :)
p.p.s.: I loved the Narendar Damodardas Modi suit. Narcissism has reached a new level and boy would I like Victoria's Secret to make ahem...such customised undies for women in hostels ;) You know why!
p.p.p.s.: Once we had to hang pumpkins to ward off evil spirits. Now it is sufficient to hang pictures of Rahul Bhaiya...see, the entire Congress Camp is empty!!!

12 comments:

  1. Quite interesting. It is absolutely normal. It is 'What' you talk which matters than your tone. Still eagerly waiting for your 'crash' course....

    Hari

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    1. Thanks a ton for the comment, Hari Sir! "Crash" course is cooking ;)

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  2. Great one to break the block with :) !!! I think most of these so called "charming female behavior" must have been designed by men and perpetrated by women !! Why should a woman disguise her joy if a man does not ? And as you say, the number of mums who expect this of their girls is dwindling!!!

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    1. Well said, Meera! Designed by men and perpetrated by women...Glad the ilk of such moms are dwindling :)

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  3. 'Good girls do not laugh aloud' is an old notion that is not relevant to modern times.I have always held an opinion that anyone who can heartily laugh is goodnatured and pleasant unlike the stiff upper lips who would not laugh even when funniest jokes are cracked..Laughter is a cloak to cover ones disappointments so long it is not done inappropriately.It lightens the mind and makes the burden smaller.Sulking aggravates.People gravitate towards those who can laugh and who brighten the atmosphere.I fear the lean hungry and sulking Cassius-like than a stout lady laughing out loudly!! I enjoyed reading your post

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    1. Ahhhh...thanks for the lovely comment, KP! "Laughter lightens the mind and makes the burden smaller"- Can't agree more!

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  4. HAAHAHHA such a great way to come out of a block!!! Could not have expected anything less from you. I am not a loud person but I know a few women who are and boy!! they are the most fun to be around.

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    1. Thanks Red! Sounds great to know you have such 'loud' friends...keep rocking!

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  5. It's women who hold back other women their most with their harsh judgement. As mothers we should give wings to our daughters and tell them, the sky is the limit.

    Lovely post, Nivedita.

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    1. Rightly said. As mothers, we should give our daughters wings and egg them on to fly :) Thanks for the visit, Purba

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  6. I speak Ok but I don't know when I lose myself. I am not weary of the surroundings and I can't put up a facade.

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    1. Saru :) Yes, we all do lose ourselves, we don't know when!

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