I had to reboot my system twice before i could finish this post- thanks to TNEB. I singularly, happily, sparingly, affectionately dedicate this post to TNEB- Tamil Nadu Electricity Board that has made us TamilNadu Elichavayar Board;) ( for those who do not understand Tamil, elichavayar means someone who miserably trusts and is failed.)
Day after day after day, night after night, we have been praying the power cuts stop, or atleast dwindle.Much to our chagrin what started as a mere three hour power shedding has now burgeoned into 10 to 12 hours a day. Imagine spending half your productive day without power, sweating and panting in this summer when the mercury shoots above 40 degrees celsius. As average tax payer who pays all taxes on time and all bills before due, i fail to understand why my inverter fails me too...And it was with bewildered daze when i read today's newspaper that TNEB received windfall gains to the tune of Rs 26584 crores in coal allotment. All this gain and still they are running at a loss??? Well, as aam admis, how to solve the power problem?
1. Chennai Challo!
Ah..Amma has spared the capital city of power cuts. It is just an hour of power cut there, that too from eight am to nine am. So, better, pack the bags and shove our ***es out of the goddamn two tier cities and rural areas. I do envy the Chennaiites, not because of the flashy roads and cars, but because brethren, you have something that we don't have- POWER! Let us all gyrate to Chennai Challo...Chennai Challo!
2. Back in time machine
Let us go back to good old black and white days, before the British and before Edison invented the electric bulb. It would be bonfires to keep us warm at nights and every household can boast of a Florence Nightingale grappling in the dark with lamps. Our Ladies with the Lamps- sans make up, have the power to scare ghosts of the entire world into oblivion! We could all travel in a time machine and meet Mr Edison and his ilk and beg them not to discover or invent electricity, our Amma would pay for the trip, including food and stay;) Oh..it will be a trip for two, so take your partner tagging along!
3. Buy back offers and pankhas
|Ammi where we grind masalas|
Ammi, aatukkal walahs can earn a fortune by having buy back offers. Women of the house, get ready to sell your wet grinders, mixers and fans and buy stone pestels, mortars, grinding stones and hand fans. Manufactures can even give offers "Buying a pestel mortar? Get a mixer free!" All Saravana stores, Rathna stores and the likes can now stock ammis and aatukkals! As for hand fans? We can tap the unorganised sector and provide jobs to millions. Go the British way! use pankhas and use pankha men or women to get you air!
4. Indian Population Control Board
If there is any such Indian Population Control Board, we can file a suit along with them against the TN government. Buggers, they switch off power at unearthly hours...errrrrr...what do we do when there is no fan, no TV and no light? Resort to the oldest game of all times;) No wonder TN's population will alarmingly increase in the next five six months...babies in the making, you see! More babies means more households and again more power demand. Ammaji, our perpetual Chief Minister, please note!
|Ah..that is our Finance Minister, at the feet of our Amma!|
Power supply to poor people of TamilNadu sans Chennai city will be erratic in many more months to come. Instead of huffing and puffing, like good old citizens of our country we have learnt to live with it. Other valuable suggestions too are welcome. Any suggestions, folks?
p.s.: Our power cut schedule everyday is from 9 am to 12 pm, 3 pm to 6 pm, 6.45 pm to 7.30 pm, 9 pm to 10 pm, 11.15 pm to 12 am, 1.15 am to 2 am, 4.15 to 5 am. So how the hell will my inverter work???
p.p.s.: Amma has won Sankarankovil bye election and immediately has announced Kudankulam plant's functioning with immediate effect. Was she waiting for the elections so far? Hail vote bank politics!
p.p.p.s.: Kudos to Didi for shunting out poor Dinesh Dwivedi. Seriously makes me wonder do we need women in politics? Though i like the feel of Meira Kumar's "Baith Jayiye! Please Bhaith Jayiye" and histrionics of Sushma Swaraj in her saree over sweater style drape;)