Look up, i say!

Men...ahhhh...this is one intriguing subject that i can ramble on and on for ages. When it comes to looks, they are just mind- blowing. Not the way they look, but the looks they give every moving being with extra weight on the torsos. Men- any variety- be the uber cool or the conservative introverts, the super smart or the plain ordinary, the eyes and the power they have enthrall me. Not the para psychic power that can bend spoons and plates, the magnetic power that can make any woman bend inwards and hang her head in shame...All these pieces manufactured with the main chip programmed to envision only the 'assets' of women! All stereotypes who start and end a conversation looking 'there' and keep their eyes rooted throughout the entire melee 'there'. 

Though the silicon revolution is catching up in India now, the raunchy hormonal libido of men goes overdrive just at the sight of the assets well marketed by women of all-woods, starting from Aishwarya Rai to Rakhi Sawant. Rakhi Sawant? Oh yeah, the Saint who challenges that every testosterone package will lose virginity to her- including the bak bak Baba! That she can do only displaying her fairly over proportioned assets is no secret...I wonder men 'look' for Rakhi in every woman they could lay their eyes upon. We can happily exclude the minimal exceptions, who like genuine friendship with women and who can keep up the friendship for ages by simply 'looking up'.

Seriously man, did you 'look' at her face, huh???

Indian average male has always been fed and pampered in a male chauvinistic society where women are looked upon..oops, there i go again...as weaker sex. And starting from 'avvaiyar kozhukkattai' ( a secret dumpling made only by women and for women with absolutely no knowledge of men of the house!) to ' those five days', Indian women remain so secretive and subdued. Result- from time immemorial men have been wanting to know what lies beneath the 'package' so much that we have them panting...' choli ke peeche kya hai?' And no wonder they try to use their left and right telescopes ( eyes!) as vernier calipers , deciphering the 'inner nirvana'! The older they get, the peering becomes promiscuous- eye sight problems at forty, you see! I wonder how the hormonal imbalances never affect the 'looking down'. 

It is totally another matter when a woman drops something down. The ' sincere sahibs' try to pick up the pen lying on the floor with their binoculars aimed at you know where...I have seen many women with the mannerism of pulling their neckline or holding their neckline as a drowning man to a stick when bending down to retrieve things! Ah...there lady, don't forget your behind...Roving eyes will already be measuring if it is L, XL or XXL!!! Libido infected men suffering from acute 'looking down's' syndrome will always haunt us. So what do we do, poor women? Simple- give them icy cold stares at the crotches!!! Oh no, one look there and you will have an entire battalion scratching the crotches, looking at you, half eyes closed! Alas...what other option do we have? Just stand up to them and say- LOOK UP!!!

P.S.: I was truly inspired to write this post when i found fellow bloggers Redhanded and Holy Crap taking up the unfair- sex bashing to new heights in blogosphere! Now it is my turn to turn the heat on;)